no rules apply

well, i kind of pooped out on NaBloPoMo at the last minute, but my sanity is still intact, so i think it was a worthy sacrifice. here's the latest in the long list of things that make me chuckle about Angel: in a few episodes from the middle of season 5, Lorne wears a ridiculously loud polka dot shirt with all sorts of lurid insane colors... it's a one of a kind shirt, and was later auctioned off on eBay. and that charming designer fabric? the exact same one i picked out in a fabric boutique in Berkeley a couple years ago when my mom wanted to make me an apron. it was SO bright, she did a double take and said, "this one?" yes, that's right, and i wear the apron with pride. i have the fashion sense of a neon green lounge singing demon from Pylea.

it's my birthday, so i'm officially excused from productive things in favor of fluff reading and hot cocoa drinking, but i may return later with Thirty Things, if the mood strikes me.

hell is... comic sans

we passed a billboard on I-65 today, one of those warnings that "it's your choice: Heaven or Hell" with some bible verse to refer to. heaven was written in some prissy typeface, and hell was in COMIC SANS. what could be more appropriate?

it was also a comfort to pass signs for Cox Smoker's Outlet and Clifty Falls (maybe you have to shop at the Inglewood Kroger in Nashville to get that one)... and i failed to mention from our trip to Michigan a couple weeks ago that the most noteworthy sightings were Rosy Mound State Park, and a Herman Miller factory which prompted us to recite "sit4less dot com, makers of the Herman Miller Aeron Chair, now available in the new color, true black. that's sit 4 less, dot com" --and we did it on the way home too and it was still funny. honk if you heart NPR!

thirty things for thursday: holiday edition

thirty things i'm thankful for today:

1. even though i'm separated from my friends & family, simultaneously utilizing red kitchenaid mixer + Paula Deen cookbooks make it feel like a holiday
2. butter
3. the supermercado around the corner that we hate going to because it smells like garbage was at least open today so when i awoke and slapped myself on the forehead for not buying eggs, i wasn't doomed
4. christmas lights and their ability to make any room look better
5. the Red Bearded fellow of my dreams who i plan to have many, many more holidays with
6. knowing what's on the menu at Delaney's Thanksgiving Dinner even though i'm not there
7. cranberry sauce! yeahhhh
8. ice cream
9. have i mentioned Paula Deen?
10. my amazing family and their neverending support
11. the wonderful world of Etsy!
12. knowing we're going back to Nashville
13. the Book Club i will return to
14. the thanksgiving phone call from my dad, detailing how he won $50 on a scratch ticket called "ugly neckties"
15. the fact that regardless of whatever i have been short on, there have always been plenty of art supplies
16. knowing people all over the world
17. the internet making everyone seem a little closer
18. knowing so many extremely talented people, i could get an expert on ANYTHING in one phone call
19. this american life podcasts
20. the ability of one double Americano to make any day at least four times better...or at least more productive
21. having the past three days and the next two to deliberate over what i'm going to eat at the Rover this weekend
22. the magic of pie
23. snow, and the bit of it that blustered around today and made me realize this city will not satisfy my nostalgia for winter
24. still having a few family members up in Alaska so i'll have people to visit
25. suddenly realizing i have a zillion frequent flyer miles saved up
26. people who still write real letters - like on paper, you know, with a pen...
27. our friends who take care of us like we're family, and there are a lot of them!
28. the giant pile of art surrounding my computer table right now
29. my hands, which are fuctional and intact after assorted trauma and drama (yes i'm knocking on wood)
30. knowing many of the things i do every day have been done by many, many people, for many, many years, since...forever

coffee and cake, what else?

another shop update! hot new prints and softies for the holidays!
bettyturbo.etsy.com

down at the Hatch

sometimes it's all hip to say "the" in front of something that doesn't need it, sometimes it just sounds uneducated, but i think every Hatch Show Print alum will agree with me that the people who refer to HSP as "the Hatch Show" are THE WORST! okay, okay, so some people just don't really know the name. it's not that big an offense. but it got on EVERYONE's nerves. that is, until i started watching LOST. and suddenly, people who asked me how things were going down at "The Hatch" were HILARIOUS. perhaps only Nieves shared in this joy. but it made for good entertainment.

so now i'm past my HSP days (weep, sniffle), and i was printing away today with the paltry handful of tools i've collected at home and actually had a good solid couple of hours of quality production. Red Beard was nearby on the computer, keeping the tunes playing while he surfed the interwebs. when he put Charlie Rich on, it occurred to me that maybe THAT's why my printing hasn't been as successful... i've neglected to line up the proper Printing Soundtrack. noting the vast improvement in my output, smile, and booty shakin, Red Beard asked, "is this what it's like at Hatch? just print all day and dance around listening to good music? just set up your psychic link to Nieves and you can have a mini Hatch right here..."

i was momentarily depressed at my lack of actual psychic link to Nieves, or Delaney, or Brad, not to mention all the other things my apartment is deficient in compared to a 128-year-old letterpress shop, but i got to thinking... when i have a real house, with a real studio, could i call it The Hatch? because no smart person would confuse Hatch with THE Hatch, and i wouldn't call it that publicly, it would just be like, "honey, i'm going out to The Hatch to make stuff" and then it would be a funny joke (okay only between Nieves, Jeremy, Red Beard and me, probably) about LOST and also a shout out to my printing days of yore.

funny, right?

okay, or my studio could just look like a big cake.

singin in the rain

i trudged down to the mail place today (it's a great company that emails me when i have a package waiting!) expecting an amazon shipment of some guilty fluff reading (no i'm not telling you what it is), but instead found a huge mystery parcel! after wrasslin it several blocks back to my house through the fog and the rain, i deduced it must be from Delaney... and i was right! and it's still ten days till my birthday, but on account of the rain, she told me to go ahead and open it.
how freaking cool are these boots from Piperlime?! i did plenty of dancing around the house in them before taking them out in the rain. gaaaaaaahhh! so cool. i have the best friends ever.

hot off the presses

more like cold off the presses. chilly and knuckle-numbing, this here wannabe printmaking studio is. but there are some tasty treats if you are holiday shopping for that special person. special like special needs, when those needs are lots and lots of Buffy.
Spike, Angel, Xander, and Giles, now available in my Etsy shop! collect them all!

thirty things for thursday rides again

thirty design motifs that i now feel unoriginal ever using because they are freakin' everywhere:

1. cupcakes
2. owls
3. moustaches
4. beards
5. skulls
6. chandeliers
7. pirates
8. lightning bolts
9. bicycles
10. ships
11. little birds with straight lines for legs
12. seed pod silhouettes
13. cameras
14. cherry blossoms
15. whales
16. snowflakes
17. sushi
18. octopi (curiously, this is marked as spelled wrong, yet octopuses is not)
19. food with faces
20. hairdo silhouettes
21. anatomical hearts
22. ninjas
23. dinosaurs
24. robots
25. giant squid
26. booomboxes
27. turntables
28. penguins
29. vintage looking western typefaces
30. guitars

oh look, there's my whole product line, right there... just kidding

dontcha just love them interwebs

today was a triumphant day for finding Long Lost People From The Past on the internet. i remember when Friendster was "it" and i kind of thought, "psh," but then i found my childhood friend Whitney, and we were reunited for Thanksgiving in New York City after not seeing each other for fifteen years. YES! the internet kicks ass! and speaking of that bodacious November of 2003, without the internet, Andrew W.K. never would have called me on my birthday...

i never lose hope that everyone i've been separated from will eventually pop up online somewhere. when they get around to it. so today i came across one of my best friends from 8th grade on MySpace, and i was thinking, "lucky day! time to search for everyone i can think of..." and i FINALLY found my best friend from the year i lived in Portugal, who i had lost touch with almost immediately. well, it's been eight years, and i'd contemplated just flying to Portugal and wandering around with her photo like a police detective, "have you seen this girl??" and today she's back! i'm back! man, this is awesome!

i think of My Life Ten Years Ago when i'd never contemplated the wonders of Gmail, Netflix, or GoogleMaps and boy, it's kinda crazy. what are your favorite Wonders of the Wide Wide World of Webs? will your kids laugh when you tell them about Life Before MySpace?

i just spent an hour digging through shoeboxes of photos trying to find a picture of Portugal to include with this entry and i can't figure out where they're hidden... so it'll have to wait.

i'm so excited i did a little dance.

coffee on the beach

accept no substitutes.

i'm mentally back on that beach right now. i confess that the whole long ride home, i thought maybe if i concentrated on it hard enough, when we got out of the car we'd be in nashville. it didn't work.

critters and cobbler

the sun was out today, glinting off the lake in such a hypnotic way that i didn't really do anything but stare at it for hours. drank coffee in front of the lake. ate a bagel in front of the lake. watched RedBeard throw rocks in the lake like it was the greatest activity ever invented. i took a stroll down the beach with our superb hostess and a book of animal tracks, identifying that there are quite possible coyotes, wolves, and bobcats prowling around out there. and a dead seagull. that one's not prowling, though, just lying there. all the animals are hiding from us so we're just collecting their paw prints like forensic photographers and waiting for them to appear and declare themselves. now we're back in the toasty warm cottage, three lounging about with laptops like a wireless advertisement, and one (of the bearded, napping type) snoring on the couch. making silent promises to ourself not to fill up on fried fish and potatoes tonight, so we'll have room for the blackberry cobbler. the boys will be drinking Edmund Fitzgerald porter on account of today being the anniversary of the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. these are the only kinds of activities on our agenda.

morning coffee in the afternoon

i slept in again. what is going on here? i never sleep in. but here i am, in an old cottage on the shore of a lake, with absolutely no car alarms or domestic disputes interrupting my slumber, and whaddaya know, i slept a long time. there's a pot of coffee in the kitchen so strong that RedBeard announced it should have a twisty mustache and a barbell. it's restoring my life force. then i'll be strong enough to open the porch door and walk five steps to the little waves lapping on the sand. that's all i have planned for the day. if i crave some more excitement, there's a giant stack of books to read, and bicycle built for two out in the shed. this is so awesome.

thirty things for thursday

thirty excuses for The Way Things Are:

1. because i was born in the snow
2. because of excessive coffee consumption
3. because i'm a gypsy
4. because i've bumped my head many times
5. because there are hot scones in the oven
6. because it's just not my style
7. because i wore cowboy boots
8. because it's red
9. because i misunderstood
10. because i walked four miles in a snowstorm
11. because i just wanted to read a book
12. because the word for toast is so close to the word for bullfight
13. because i ride the bus
14. because of a family recipe
15. because my hands are small
16. because i couldn't stop dancing
17. because it was close-captioned
18. because i put the spoon in my pocket
19. because i was too quiet
20. because i'll watch any movie with dancing in it
21. because butter makes things taste better
22. because of a full moon
23. because i tripped down the stairs
24. because i'm a sucker for a piano
25. because it came out of the river
26. because it seemed like home
27. because i was much smarter than them
28. because it was a rock & roll band
29. because it was destiny
30. because cupcakes make people happy

moustache of the week

wouldn't it be great if i could report to you on all the moustaches i find around here? i've thought of doing another poster like the one i did for Reverend Glasseye, as a map document of the neighborhoods i frequent... moustaches of Wicker Park, say, or moustaches of the #66 Chicago Ave bus... but, well, i've been kind of a homebody. so i can't think of who wins this week. but i'm STILL dreaming of the moustache of last week -- boy was it a doozy.

this is Franz Nicolay of the Hold Steady and i stole this image from their myspace page.

...did i flunk?

i haven't gone to bed yet, is it still monday night? it was an ass-kicking sort of a monday, so when one of my birthday presents arrived a few weeks early, i indulged. we spent the last five hours enjoying the beginning of it. that, and a fridge full of delicious Trader Joe's goodness, should be plenty for me to hibernate in this here basement for several days. grrr. aarrgh.

further ruminations on the ugliest cupcakes ever

really. they're really awful. i let them cool, and they look even more pathetic. and frosted, they're a total disaster. if you'd just walked in my kitchen, i'd say, "well, they already looked so dumpy, i couldn't be bothered to pipe frosting on in a civilized fashion..." but i'd be lying! because i did pipe frosting on in a civilized fashion, with a fancy tip and all, but it was like the cupcakes were in drag. they looked like they were trying to act sophisticated and it was completely hopeless, with their little jagged uneven mutant edges peeking out. so i smeared em all down with a spatula and covered them in sprinkles. this is so embarrassing. i'm contemplating walking out the door and passing them off to the first neighbor i see, before anyone further associates these monstrosities with my cupcake reputation.

i must be stuck in the lost hour, where no elegant cupcakes are ever born.

daylight savings ate my brain

do you remember the show Eerie, Indiana? there was an episode in which Marshall gets mad because his freaky town doesn't observe daylight savings, so when he sets his watch back he gets sucked into "the lost hour" and there was a milkman...and when Marshall looked into the back of the milk truck, his face appeared on a milk carton in his normal life...or something like that.

about mid-day today, whilst i was reading my congratulatory messages for my yelp review of the day (funny story, that), and RedBeard napped on the couch again, i looked at the clock and thought OH! IT'S EARLIER! and i had completely forgotten about daylight savings up until that point. i almost did a little dance. fall back in fall! sweet! a whole extra hour in the day for laziness and lounging about! only as soon as i gave myself over to this celebration, something happened. i think my brain went to the lost hour. RedBeard left to watch the football game at a buddie's house, and i had all these grand ambitions of making progress on these prints i'm doing, since i even cleared some workspace...

but i'm sitting around like a bump on a log. glaring at my book with 120 pages left to read in it. snarling at the uncut piece of linoleum waiting to be sliced into a masterpiece. i rearranged the DVDs on the shelves, without putting them in any useful order at all. i just wanted to move things. i washed dishes. i cleaned the scummy goo off the feet of the dishdrainer. i looked at a blank pad of paper and a pen without blinking for about ten minutes. i got on the ole Google Reader, and upon noticing nobody i'm following for NaBloPoMo has updated their blog yet today, i STILL clicked on all of them to see if maybe Google was mistaken. nope. finally, i decided i could at least motivate myself to make some cupcakes. after all, it's someone's birthday tomorrow! which is kind of a jerk reason to make cupcakes, because said birthday girl leads a gluten-free lifestyle, and i don't have any tapioca flour or garbanzo flour on hand, so they will be cupcakes for everyone BUT the birthday girl. how lame. anyhow, i was noticing how foil baking cups always brag about how you don't need cupcake tins to bake them in, you can just put the cups on a baking sheet. i thought, HEY! I'VE NEVER DONE THAT! and maybe it would save time, and be easier to clean up or something. only i just peeked in the oven, and there has been a cupcake mutiny. they're all touching, four deep and six wide, they've banded together, against me, to form one giant cupcake. looks DO count. this does not look good.

whose milk truck do i have to peek into to get my productivity back today?!

lazy saturday

it actually felt like We Live Here today. we slept in half the day - and we NEVER do that. we're notoriously unable to stay in bed past 9am. we bumbled around in our pjs and ate the scones that remained from last night. we met two of our awesome new pals at our favorite local diner for breakfast at 2pm. then came naps - well, RedBeard napped, and i drew a portrait of him sleeping, in between chapters of this wacky book i'm reading. it was just chilly enough outside to bundle up in our peacoats before heading down to the neighborhood comic shop, Vigilante Press, for their anniversary party. the husband and wife that run this place are some of the nicest people we've met in Chicago, and i must say, their spread of party snacks put every gallery opening we've been to here to shame. since we bothered to get dressed, we stayed out a little longer and paid a visit to a lounge just blocks from home that we've somehow neglected until today. the California Clipper has been around since the 30s and has decor just my style, (and in my signature color, no less), not to mention grape soda on the gun, and their own ghost. the honky tonk band playing was pretty lackluster, but the vibe definitely comforted us in a Nashville nostalgia sort of way.

it's nice to be able to take a deep breath, and just hang out. i forget what it's like sometimes.

train song to end all train songs

there are no desserts or mustaches in this post, but i have to tell you about the most amazing thing, and i will warn you in advance there is absolutely no way you will understand just by reading about it. last night at the show, the pine hill haints played before the shack*shakers (they are out on tour with them for several dates), and they did the wildest thing... (yes, enough to wow ME, the one who has seen the shack*shakers at least 20 times and judges all other performers accordingly) --now i have seen the haints a handful of times, and i always thought they were awesome, but last night they played this train song that completely blew us away. (and if you know RedBeard, you know he has a thing for trains, and even got one tattooed on hisself...) so this ghosty song about a train, (and they KNOW their ghost stories), all of a sudden, became a train. it was not train noises. it was not a johnny cash chug-a-lug rhythm guitar. it was the entire band - and that means an archtop guitar, a washboard, a washtub bass, and a freaking snare drum - and then it was not a band, it was a whistling, steaming, chugging, loud, earth-rumbling, you're in the freaking train station, TRAIN. we're talking tibetan monks creating people that didn't exist before just by concentrating on them in their mind, here it is in the abbey pub, manifested for your experience, TRAIN. RedBeard and i were squeezing each other's hands and weren't quite sure whether to cry or faint. it was unbelievable. it was one of the most incredible things i've ever heard. and felt in my stomach. but not seen. seriously.

hello november!

howdy pardners. november is here! best month EVER. in addition to the many other things making the next thirty days lovely and important, i've signed on for NaBloPoMo, so you'll be hearing blogitudes from me EVERY DAY this month. for reals. so here's a report card of how november is shaping up so far:

the Good Hard Thump method - after several days of distress over the lack of cooperation from my scanner, i posted a bulletin asking for help from any techie people. most folks concluded that my flatbed friend had already outlived its life expectancy and i should just move on. the sagelike wisdom of H.B. suggested i not overlook the Good Hard Thump method, and i thought, "what the hell." so i mustered up the powers of Hellboy, Papelbon, and other turbo righthanded heroes, and gave the scanner a good solid punch with my fist. and it worked! punching my scanner into submission! = A

brand new redheaded baby! - my brother and his wife had a baby boy today, and his name is Will! (or William, but never Willie, this they are sure of.) he is over 9 lbs and he has bright red hair! welcome to the family, little buddy! another tiny baby to make softies for! = A+

the Long Way Home - well, the book of the first five issues of the Buffy Season 8 Comic came out yesterday, RedBeard picked it up after work and read it before bed, and i read it today over my morning coffee. OH MAN. and i only just finished watching the entire series a few weeks ago. some fans have been waiting years. there are still characters i don't really give a crap about, and i don't love the way they are drawing Giles, but damn if this doesn't take care of a big hankerin i've been having. it doesn't replace seeing the adventures an hour at a time, but it's still the shiny shiny brilliance of Joss Whedon, and for this i am thrilled. a whole bookshelf for our Whedonverse media! = A

shacks preparing to be shaken - my love for th' legendary shack*shakers is no secret, and i haven't seen them in forever! if you don't count this summer's appearance at Lebowskifest, which i don't, because it was outside, during the day, i haven't seen a shack*shakers show since April 2006, the show for which the fates brought BettyTurbo and RedBeard together again. so it's about damn time. they're playing in Chicago tonight, a welcome addition to my Calendar of Free Things To Do, (if you're not a VIP like me you'll have to shell out $15), so some of our aching saudades for Nashville will be temporarily alleviated. being on the guest list! = A

not bad, eh? stay tuned for more november goodness. you have 28 shopping days left till my birthday.